You may not be an idiot, but you are gullible. Instead of

Comment on Apollo Moon Landing Hoax by Kitten Mitten.

You may not be an idiot, but you are gullible. Instead of believing the foolishness you read on websites like this, get thee to a library.

Go to the beach. Sit your mum under a beach unbrella. Despite being in ALL THAT SHADE, she is clearly illuminated! How can that be?! Because all that sunlight being reflected off the beach sand is going somewhere, and that somewhere is to illuminate your mummy.

And so on and so forth.